It's been six years,
since that unforgettable day
when you arrived too soon.
Although, we're not sure
of God's purpose and plan,
we're at rest that His way is best.
Those few bittersweet hours
are precious indeed,
we're grateful for each moment,
yet God's time was at hand,
He swept you away to dwell
in His presence forever.
You'll always remain
a part of our family,
the sweet memory of you
permanently engraved in our hearts and mind.
Happy Birthday!
Love,
Your Family
In memory our son Isaiah David, February 24, 2002 - February 24, 2002
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Seasonal Contentment
"To every thing there is a season,and a time to every purpose under the heaven:" Ecclesiastes 3:1
Here we are in the middle of the winter season, a time of cold and snow, a time for the ground to rest and for us to slow down and enjoy our families. I am also in the middle of a pregnancy, a time to conserve my energy and prepare for the upcoming season of birth. I have not always viewed the winter season from a positive viewpoint. In fact up until this year I actually hated winter. Winter for me provided the frustration of feeling trapped which in turn led to depression. I was basing my emotions and feelings on my physical surroundings. Despite the fact that this winter has been unusually cold and snowy I have not experienced the negative feelings and emotions that have bombarded me in the past. This morning as I emailed some friends I was expressing my thankfulness, that the blessing of homeschooling allows me to remain inside on cold days, like today. One friend commented that I must feel "cooped up" at times because of the weather and having the kids inside. I can honestly say that I have not experienced that "cooped up" feeling this year, in fact I feel as free as a bird despite the cold and snow.
So what changed? My perspective on life! God has been teaching me to be content no matter what the circumstances(Phil 4:11). I no longer put so much emphasis on my surroundings and circumstance, but instead look to God's truth. He is faithful, He will never leave me or forsake me(Heb 13:5). He knows what I need moment by moment if only I will wait upon Him and trust Him. He is teaching me to embrace the seasons of life and enjoy the unique blessings of each season. God has given me so many blessing this season that I would have missed had I had my eyes on the circumstance, instead of Him.
God is truly teaching me the truth of 1 Timothy 6:6 "But godliness with contentment is great gain." A lesson I am thankful to learn.
May God open your eyes to His truth and bring your circumstances into His perspective.
In Him,
Living Free
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Breath of God
This morning we awoke to rain, which soon turned to a fast, heavy snowfall. The sky remained gray throughout the day with thick snow falling. Later in the afternoon the wind picked up and sent the snow swirling, making for quite a blurry scene out the window, but then late afternoon I glanced out the window and saw a the pink reflection of the sun peeking above the clouds on the western horizon, illuminating the snow covered fields and trees; like the breath of God breathing down onto the frozen depths of humanity. It brought to mind the following hymn by Edwin Hatch.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Fill me with life anew,
That I may love what Thou dost love,
And do what Thou wouldst do.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Until my heart is pure,
Until with Thee I will one will,
To do and to endure.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Blend all my soul with Thine,
Until this earthly part of me
Glows with Thy fire divine.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
So shall I never die,
But live with Thee the perfect life
Of Thine eternity.
May God breath His love and life in you.
In Him,
Living Free
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Fill me with life anew,
That I may love what Thou dost love,
And do what Thou wouldst do.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Until my heart is pure,
Until with Thee I will one will,
To do and to endure.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
Blend all my soul with Thine,
Until this earthly part of me
Glows with Thy fire divine.
Breathe on me, breath of God,
So shall I never die,
But live with Thee the perfect life
Of Thine eternity.
May God breath His love and life in you.
In Him,
Living Free
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Our Surroundings
From February 8, 2008
Today I managed to put away the Christmas tree. I usually take it down the week after Christmas, but since my parents did not come up until mid-January I agreed with the kids to leave it up until after we celebrated Christmas with them. That was 3 weeks ago! This morning as I stood surveying my cluttered living room, the Christmas tree caught my eye. I had become so accustomed to it standing there, that I no longer took notice of it. It had become a normal part of my surroundings.
God impressed upon my heart how this can happen not only in the physical, but the spiritual as well. I can become so accustomed to sin in my own life that I no longer take notice of it, but rather ignore it or dismiss it. An example would be my attitude. Negativity, harshness, snippiness can become some common place in my words and tone that I no longer notice it, but I'm sure those around me do, just as someone else would immediately notice the Christmas tree still standing in my living room. Doubt, worry, anxiety and fear work the same way. I can become so consumed with a thought or idea that it takes over my mind and controls my thoughts and actions, without me ever realizing its there. How about anger? My impatience and frustration can cause me to quickly lose my temper and raise my voice, but that's just my type A personality, right? I've become so used to that reaction that I've dismissed it as my personality. Desensitization is the technical term for dulling of my conscience and the acceptability of sin in my life. That is not where I want to be. I want to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and His conviction in my life over sin.
"Lord I pray that you would make me sensitive to the Spirit's leading in my life. Go through my heart and mind and clear out the cobwebs of sin. Open my eyes to there presence, that I may confess them before you and let you sweep them out of my heart. May I speak kind and encouraging words. Take my thoughts captive and bring them into obedience to you. Fill me with your love and enable me to overlook the mulititude of frustrations and irratations that face me each day. Make me forbearing and forgiving. Above all help me to abide in You, that you may live your life through me." - Amen
In Him,
Living Free
"When we fail to abide in Christ, sin is not the root problem, but the symptoms. The real issue is that we are living out of our own sufficiency, independantly of Christ." - Steve McVey in "Grace Walk"
Today I managed to put away the Christmas tree. I usually take it down the week after Christmas, but since my parents did not come up until mid-January I agreed with the kids to leave it up until after we celebrated Christmas with them. That was 3 weeks ago! This morning as I stood surveying my cluttered living room, the Christmas tree caught my eye. I had become so accustomed to it standing there, that I no longer took notice of it. It had become a normal part of my surroundings.
God impressed upon my heart how this can happen not only in the physical, but the spiritual as well. I can become so accustomed to sin in my own life that I no longer take notice of it, but rather ignore it or dismiss it. An example would be my attitude. Negativity, harshness, snippiness can become some common place in my words and tone that I no longer notice it, but I'm sure those around me do, just as someone else would immediately notice the Christmas tree still standing in my living room. Doubt, worry, anxiety and fear work the same way. I can become so consumed with a thought or idea that it takes over my mind and controls my thoughts and actions, without me ever realizing its there. How about anger? My impatience and frustration can cause me to quickly lose my temper and raise my voice, but that's just my type A personality, right? I've become so used to that reaction that I've dismissed it as my personality. Desensitization is the technical term for dulling of my conscience and the acceptability of sin in my life. That is not where I want to be. I want to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and His conviction in my life over sin.
"Lord I pray that you would make me sensitive to the Spirit's leading in my life. Go through my heart and mind and clear out the cobwebs of sin. Open my eyes to there presence, that I may confess them before you and let you sweep them out of my heart. May I speak kind and encouraging words. Take my thoughts captive and bring them into obedience to you. Fill me with your love and enable me to overlook the mulititude of frustrations and irratations that face me each day. Make me forbearing and forgiving. Above all help me to abide in You, that you may live your life through me." - Amen
In Him,
Living Free
"When we fail to abide in Christ, sin is not the root problem, but the symptoms. The real issue is that we are living out of our own sufficiency, independantly of Christ." - Steve McVey in "Grace Walk"
Inadequacy
From February 4, 2008
Many times when I consider undertaking a project or task I baulk, doubting my abilities. I am too familiar with my inadequacies, they face me throughout the day as I struggle to fulfill my duties as a wife and mother. I see other women and all they seem to be accomplishing at home and in ministry and my inadequacies loom up before me to disproportionate magnitudes, yet even if I lived a seemingly perfect life accomplishing all I set out to do, remaining calm, patient and kind no matter the irratation, serving God with every word and deed, it would still be inadequate.
You see God created me to be inadequate, to fail, to sin, for it is in my imperfections and weakness that drive me to His son Jesus. My inadequacies force me first to Jesus for His saving grace and then to His Father for His all sufficiency.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10
"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong."
What joy and freedom this truth brings. No longer do I have to fear my inadequacies or strive for perfection. I only have to abide in Him and let Him be my sufficiency.
In Him,
Living Free
"Returning to the simple belief that God is in control, telling Him every detail of my trouble and resting in His care is the greatest source of my confidence." - Bob Schultz in "Created For Work"
Many times when I consider undertaking a project or task I baulk, doubting my abilities. I am too familiar with my inadequacies, they face me throughout the day as I struggle to fulfill my duties as a wife and mother. I see other women and all they seem to be accomplishing at home and in ministry and my inadequacies loom up before me to disproportionate magnitudes, yet even if I lived a seemingly perfect life accomplishing all I set out to do, remaining calm, patient and kind no matter the irratation, serving God with every word and deed, it would still be inadequate.
You see God created me to be inadequate, to fail, to sin, for it is in my imperfections and weakness that drive me to His son Jesus. My inadequacies force me first to Jesus for His saving grace and then to His Father for His all sufficiency.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10
"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong."
What joy and freedom this truth brings. No longer do I have to fear my inadequacies or strive for perfection. I only have to abide in Him and let Him be my sufficiency.
In Him,
Living Free
"Returning to the simple belief that God is in control, telling Him every detail of my trouble and resting in His care is the greatest source of my confidence." - Bob Schultz in "Created For Work"
Hooray for Freedom
A friend of mine recently posted some idiosyncrasies about herself on her blog, after someone had tagged her to do so. I have so many that I am not sure where I would begin, so thankfully she did not tag me! As I was reading her blog, God really reminded me of some of the idiosyncrasies He has freed me from. Here are a few that came to my mind:
1 - Washing the kids snowsuits, coats, hats, and gloves every day that they played out in the snow. It was no wonder that I had such a dislike of winter, with all the extra work it created. I now only wash their outwear when it is either completely covered in mud or I begin to smell it as I pass through the hall.
2 - Obsessing over keeping up with the laundry. In our house laundry is never ending, I refer to it as MT. Evermore. In the past I always attempted to stay ahead of the laundry, I couldn't stand to see it piled up. Now I don't mind a pile of dirty clothes laying in the laundry room. I wash about 3 days a week and spend one day folding and putting away. This frees me up to spend more time with the family and less in the laundry room. We make folding day a family affair!
3 - I can now let the kids help me fold and put away the laundry because I no longer must have it folded exactly to my standards.
4 - I no longer expect myself to do it all. I realize that I can't and that God did not create me to. It is ok for me to ask for help and that in asking for help I allow someone else the opportunity to be a blessing!
5 - Over reacting. Now while I still tend to over react, the tendancy is much diminished. I find it much easier to trust in God and His sovereignty in all things.
As I look at the above examples I realize that those idiosyncrasies stemmed from underlying heart issues. God is working from the inside out as I come to know Him more and more. I find it much easier to rest in Him and trust in Him, because I have gotten a glimpse of His true character. As He reveals to me His truth, I find myself much more accepting of His grace in my life and the ability to extend it to others. I still have a long way to go, I am thank ful for His patience and longsuffering, for it takes many, many lessons for me to finally get it!
In Him,
Living Free
1 - Washing the kids snowsuits, coats, hats, and gloves every day that they played out in the snow. It was no wonder that I had such a dislike of winter, with all the extra work it created. I now only wash their outwear when it is either completely covered in mud or I begin to smell it as I pass through the hall.
2 - Obsessing over keeping up with the laundry. In our house laundry is never ending, I refer to it as MT. Evermore. In the past I always attempted to stay ahead of the laundry, I couldn't stand to see it piled up. Now I don't mind a pile of dirty clothes laying in the laundry room. I wash about 3 days a week and spend one day folding and putting away. This frees me up to spend more time with the family and less in the laundry room. We make folding day a family affair!
3 - I can now let the kids help me fold and put away the laundry because I no longer must have it folded exactly to my standards.
4 - I no longer expect myself to do it all. I realize that I can't and that God did not create me to. It is ok for me to ask for help and that in asking for help I allow someone else the opportunity to be a blessing!
5 - Over reacting. Now while I still tend to over react, the tendancy is much diminished. I find it much easier to trust in God and His sovereignty in all things.
As I look at the above examples I realize that those idiosyncrasies stemmed from underlying heart issues. God is working from the inside out as I come to know Him more and more. I find it much easier to rest in Him and trust in Him, because I have gotten a glimpse of His true character. As He reveals to me His truth, I find myself much more accepting of His grace in my life and the ability to extend it to others. I still have a long way to go, I am thank ful for His patience and longsuffering, for it takes many, many lessons for me to finally get it!
In Him,
Living Free
Monday, February 11, 2008
Winter Happenings
Yesterday I awoke to Judah opening my blinds and announcing, "it looks like we're going to have a beautiful day!" Yes, the sun was shining brightly, but don't let that fool you. To all of my southern friends and family I have no better way to describe the weather here, than colder than cold! Yesterday's high was -2. I am not even sure why anyone would bother measuring the temperature below zero. Our low was somewhere in the negative teens and with the wind it felt like -30, those are Fahrenheit temps, not celcius. Needless to say, I did not venture out to see how it felt. Judah was tempted to venture out to test his hypothesis of freezing spit(will it freeze before it hits the ground). Mind you he came up with that on his own.
Today remained colder than cold with the temperature hovering at zero, but the sun did not shine and the clouds dropped another 6 inches of snow. Compared to last weeks 24 inches in 24 hours, that's not so bad! I kept the blinds closed, not really wanting to see more snow. I'm not complaining, this is the season for staying home and spending time together. Besides when it gets into the teen later this week it'll feel like a heat wave and I'll only need a light weight jacket.
Here's a few kid happenings:
Last night I found Sarah in my bathroom with her shirt off rolling deodorant all over herself. Noah informed me she was putting on her underarms!
Noah fell(more likely wash pushed by a sibling who will remain unnamed)and nicked his forehead. He is quite proud of his war wound and hopes it will leave scar.
Tonight when I was helping Judah with his reading, he read, "Jan sips pop." and told me that it made no sense. "How can you sip a noise?", he asked. In our house and the south it is coke, not pop.
That's all for now. My computer is slow and I need to help Abby with her piano.
In Him,
Living Free
Today remained colder than cold with the temperature hovering at zero, but the sun did not shine and the clouds dropped another 6 inches of snow. Compared to last weeks 24 inches in 24 hours, that's not so bad! I kept the blinds closed, not really wanting to see more snow. I'm not complaining, this is the season for staying home and spending time together. Besides when it gets into the teen later this week it'll feel like a heat wave and I'll only need a light weight jacket.
Here's a few kid happenings:
Last night I found Sarah in my bathroom with her shirt off rolling deodorant all over herself. Noah informed me she was putting on her underarms!
Noah fell(more likely wash pushed by a sibling who will remain unnamed)and nicked his forehead. He is quite proud of his war wound and hopes it will leave scar.
Tonight when I was helping Judah with his reading, he read, "Jan sips pop." and told me that it made no sense. "How can you sip a noise?", he asked. In our house and the south it is coke, not pop.
That's all for now. My computer is slow and I need to help Abby with her piano.
In Him,
Living Free
Monday, February 4, 2008
Taxonomy
February 4, 2008
We've been back for a little over a week now and life is back to normal. The laundry is behind again(my mom kept up with it while she was here), and we are trying to balance the school work with the house work. The weather continues to be gloomy, but in everything give thanks. I am thankful for a warm house and no reason to go out. I am thankful for having the opportunity to keep my children home with me and to learn along side them. I am thankful that this weather urges me to cuddle up with the kids and read them a good story. I am thankful that we have rain today and not ice, although I think snow is better than rain this time of year. I am thankful that spring is around the corner and we can spend long leisurely days at the park.
In preparation for spring we are studying Botany. The kids started some herbs last week. Glenn and Judah built us a really nice growing stand with uv lights, so that we can start our seeds early. Today we are learning taxonomy(aka:organization). We are learning how scientist classify things, and our project is shoe taxonomy. We all gathered in the hallway to sort, classify and divide shoes. With a family of 7 and each person having at least 4 pairs of shoes, we have pleny of specimens to work with. As we dived into our shoe taxonomy I discovered that our cooperation skills needed some improvement. My scientist in training will be spending some time today learning to work with other scientist, we have many taxonomy projects for them to practice both their skills of cooperation and classification. Maybe the laundry will get caught up after all: laundry taxonomy!
This morning as I was faced with the day and feeling overwhelmed with all that "needed" to be done, I could feel the divide and conquer spirit coming over me. I stopped and cried out to God for Him to direct my day and give me a vision of His plan for this day, that I would be following His ways and thoughts, instead of mine own. He is so faithful! We need only take the time to rest in His presence and hear His direction. Without His direction I would have divided myself between the house work and school work and would have missed this wonderful opportunity of teaching my children His plan for the day, and I would have gotten further behind and overwhelmed. How thankful I am that we can teach our children throughout the day in each and every task and opportunity God puts before us. It is so much more than academics, but building relationships and molding character.
Thank you God for the priviledge and opportunity to train up my children, every second of every day. God keep my eyes fixed on you and ears open to your still small voice, that I may know and obey your plan. You alone God bring balance and contentment to my life.-Amen
In Him,
Living Free
We've been back for a little over a week now and life is back to normal. The laundry is behind again(my mom kept up with it while she was here), and we are trying to balance the school work with the house work. The weather continues to be gloomy, but in everything give thanks. I am thankful for a warm house and no reason to go out. I am thankful for having the opportunity to keep my children home with me and to learn along side them. I am thankful that this weather urges me to cuddle up with the kids and read them a good story. I am thankful that we have rain today and not ice, although I think snow is better than rain this time of year. I am thankful that spring is around the corner and we can spend long leisurely days at the park.
In preparation for spring we are studying Botany. The kids started some herbs last week. Glenn and Judah built us a really nice growing stand with uv lights, so that we can start our seeds early. Today we are learning taxonomy(aka:organization). We are learning how scientist classify things, and our project is shoe taxonomy. We all gathered in the hallway to sort, classify and divide shoes. With a family of 7 and each person having at least 4 pairs of shoes, we have pleny of specimens to work with. As we dived into our shoe taxonomy I discovered that our cooperation skills needed some improvement. My scientist in training will be spending some time today learning to work with other scientist, we have many taxonomy projects for them to practice both their skills of cooperation and classification. Maybe the laundry will get caught up after all: laundry taxonomy!
This morning as I was faced with the day and feeling overwhelmed with all that "needed" to be done, I could feel the divide and conquer spirit coming over me. I stopped and cried out to God for Him to direct my day and give me a vision of His plan for this day, that I would be following His ways and thoughts, instead of mine own. He is so faithful! We need only take the time to rest in His presence and hear His direction. Without His direction I would have divided myself between the house work and school work and would have missed this wonderful opportunity of teaching my children His plan for the day, and I would have gotten further behind and overwhelmed. How thankful I am that we can teach our children throughout the day in each and every task and opportunity God puts before us. It is so much more than academics, but building relationships and molding character.
Thank you God for the priviledge and opportunity to train up my children, every second of every day. God keep my eyes fixed on you and ears open to your still small voice, that I may know and obey your plan. You alone God bring balance and contentment to my life.-Amen
In Him,
Living Free
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)